CHILD CUSTODY AND ACCESS LAWYER

It is easy to confuse these two terms. People often use them interchangeably, but legally, they should not be used at all. the words “Custody” and “Access” have been changed to “decision-Making Responsibility” and “Parenting time”.

Parenting Decision-Making, formerly referred to as Custody, is about who will make major decisions for your children.  Decision-making does not apply to smaller, day-to-day decisions such as whether your children will go to a friend's Birthday Party or what they will eat for dinner. Instead, it is about major decisions for your children, such as who their doctor will be, what (if any) medications they will take, what school they will attend, and what (if any) religion they will be taught to practice.  

There Are Different Ways to Structure Decision-Making for Children

There are many ways for parents to share their Decision-Making responsibilities for their children.  The two most common ways to share these responsibilities are Sole Decision-Making and Joint Decision-Making.  

Joint Decision-making

Joint Decision-Making, formerly Joint Custody, means that both (or all) parents make major decisions for their children together.  Joint Decision-Making is the most common type of Decision-Making arrangement because in most cases, all parents are capable of making decisions for their children, and it is usually best for children to have all of their parents involved in making these decisions.  Unless there are reasons against doing so, Joint Decision-Making is usually best for your children.

Joint Decision-Making does not mean that you and your spouse must speak with one another.  If you cannot be in the same room with your spouse, or even speak with each other on the telephone, then you may be able to make decisions regarding your children via e-mail, text message, or using parenting software designed to help parents communicate with one another about their children.

Sole Decision-making

However, if you and your spouse cannot make major decisions regarding your children together, Sole Decision-Making may be the best option for your family.  Sole Decision-Making responsibilities for the children means that one parent makes all of the major decisions for the children.  Sole Decision-Making may be appropriate if you and your spouse cannot communicate effectively regarding your children, if your spouse is not capable of making reasonable decisions for your children, or if there are abuse issues.  

Split CustodY

Another Parenting Decision-Making option is Split Decision-Making.  Split Decision-Making can mean that one parent makes some decisions and the other parent(s) make other decisions.  For example, you could make all medical decisions for your children, and your spouse could make all educational decisions.

Doing What's Best For Your Children is what Matters Most

Deciding what type of Decision-Making is best for your family involves determining which Decision-Making regime is best for your children.  What is best for you or your spouse may not be relevant; what is best for your children is what matters most.

What Does Access Mean?

In contrast to Decision-Making, Parenting Time, formerly referred to as Access, is about time spent with your children.  In order to resolve the Parenting Time issues in your matter, you should think about your schedule, your spouse's schedule, and your children's schedules to come up with a Parenting Time Schedule that works best for your children.  Making a detailed Parenting Time Schedule is important because it will help you and your spouse know who should be with the children when, and who will be responsible for taking your children wherever they need to go.

Create A Parenting Time Schedule

It is very important that you create a Parenting Time Schedule that works well for your children because once you create a Parenting Time Schedule, it can be difficult to change it.  A consistent schedule can help you provide your children with the stability that they need, so changing the Parenting Time Schedule often may not be best for your children.

It is also important to be flexible.  If a special occasion or an unforeseen issue arises, it is important that you to do insist upon strict adherence to the Parenting Time Schedule.  For example, if your children are invited to a party on your spouse’s side of the family during their time with you, you should probably allow them to go to the party.  Or, if you are late picking up the children because of poor weather conditions, your spouse should be understanding.  A good Parenting Time Schedule should help create a balance between certainty and flexibility.

Just like resolving major Decision-Making issues for your children, creating a Parenting Time Schedule is about what is best for your children, and not what is most convenient to you or your spouse. 

Consult a Child Custody Lawyer For Custody & Access Issues

If you have any concerns about the safety of your children while they are with your spouse, you should speak with a lawyer about these concerns right away.  If these concerns are serious, you may have an obligation to contact the Children’s Aid Society.

To book a free consultation please call:  (905) 237-7332