In the previous post, we talked about settlement, about the court’s expectation that you and your soon-to-be ex resolve most, if not all, of your issues before your case ever gets to Trial. But just how are you supposed to accomplish this impossible task? Offers to Settle.

Going to Court does not mean you will be going to Trial. In fact, a case could be made that Family Court’s whole raison d’être is to help you avoid Trial. In Ontario, less than 1% of Family Law cases go all the way to Trial. You do not want to be part of that 1%.

Fair warning. It’s a wearying slog to the courthouse.  Be prepared for the journey, from first step to last, to take anywhere from several months to two years.  If your situation is complicated, or you and your spouse are adversarial, or sometimes just because of court delays, it may well take much longer.

Maybe you and your ex are walking out of your marriage with no hard feelings or bruised egos. Maybe you still get along well and can put old grievances aside.  Maybe talking to your ex doesn’t twist your stomach into knots and send your blood pressure through the roof.

 Maybe, but probably not.

The marriage is over. You want out, your spouse wants out, but neither of you wants your issues to rain all over the kids. The thought of your four-year-old in a court room answering questions from a judge makes you cringe. The idea of some stranger interrogating your ten-year-old, asking him/her to choose between you doesn’t sit well either.

But would that happen? If you go to court will your children have to appear before a judge?

Tears blur your phone screen. Anger punches your fingers at the keyboard as you hit up Google looking for a Family Law lawyer. You want the kids, the house, and the vintage LP collection your spouse has spent a fortune on. You want an attack dog of a lawyer who will fight to get it all for you. That’s what a lawyer does, right? Fight for you?

Yes, and…no.

Want Custody of your children? Well sorry, you can’t have it, because it’s not a thing anymore.

As of March 1, 2021, the definitions Custody and Access have been repealed. In their place, the Divorce Act now uses the terms Decision-Making Responsibility and Parenting Time.

They lied. Your ex’s family helped him/her hide assets from the courts. It wasn’t an innocent mistake, an accidental oversight. It was a deliberate conspiracy to make it look like your ex had less so that you would get less in the divorce settlement. They know it, you know it, and you have the paperwork to prove it, but what can you do about it?

You’re worried. No, scratch that. You were worried; now, you’re scared. You tried to talk to your ex, but (s)he isn’t listening. You sent e-mails. You texted, you even sent a few DMs, but nope, no response.

Before Covid-19 devastated the world, access visits weren’t an issue. You’re both good parents. So long as the children were happy, you were okay with whatever plans your ex had for their time together.

But we’re living in a Covid-19 world now, and you need to know that your ex is following Covid-19 safety protocols.

Today, we would like to set aside our usual content and amplify black voices.

We, at Warsi Daitchman LLP, would like to take this time to let you know that we are here for you, and with you. We commit to doing our part in educating ourselves, on learning and teaching others about privilege, supporting advocates and organizations focused on tackling systemic and institutionalized racism, and addressing the daily macro and micro aggressions aimed at oppressing our fellow racialized brothers and sisters in humanity. Enough is enough.

Stay safe. Stay home. Stay two metres away from everyone, except immediate family. Clear, concise. Nothing ambiguous about this directive from the Ontario government…

Uh, not so fast.

What does immediate family mean, exactly? What does family mean when divorced parents have new partners, and children have siblings in a blended family?

Will the Court consider children’s established family routines?

Just when you thought the worst was behind you, and a court case was finally started to deal with the issues between you and your ex. You felt like you were on route to getting your life back on track, and then Covid-19 shuts the courts down. Now what?

Judges will hear urgent cases, but as much as you want this part of your life signed, sealed, and done, you’re not in dire need.

There is another option. If your court case is stuck on delay due to Covid-19, you can still get a Consent Order, even during the pandemic.

You had it all planned out. You’ll sell this house and move with your child to a new place for a new beginning, but then Covid-19 happened, and it has taken over our lives. Can you sell or not…err perhaps.

To protect ourselves, our families, and our communities, we have been forced to adopt stringent policies of physical distancing and self-isolation. We are, each of us, responsible for the health and well-being of those around us.

But is letting potential buyers into your home a danger to you and your children?

Thanks to Covid-19 restrictions, you’ve lost your job. The bills are piling up, the kids need to eat, and you could really use the child support your ex hasn’t paid in months. The money sitting in trust from the sale of the house you and your ex owned would come in handy too, but can you get either of these chunks of change?

Yes.

But—you knew there was a but, right?—you have to be in an urgent financial situation.

Covid-19 has redefined our concept of what is essential, necessary, and urgent.

Like the general public, the courts now face the issue of recognizing what urgent means during a pandemic. What if your ex took thousands from the joint line of credit? Is that COVID urgent? The case of Thomas and Wohleber gives us some more insight about that.

We now have the first case about interim exclusive possession of the Matrimonial Home and virtual parenting time during the Covid-19 lockdown.

We already know that Courts are prepared to deal with the urgent issue of a parent denying the other parenting time during this pandemic . We are now seeing the opposite: when necessary, Judges are also prepared to kick one parent out of the home and implement a virtual parenting time schedule for the parent who must leave.

We are all facing upheaval in our lives and daily routines due to #COVID-19, with the little ones perhaps feeling it most. They cannot see their teachers, friends, and cannot even go to the library. We are told to #StayHome and practice #SocialDistancing.

Does this mean that the children’s time with their other parent should be suspended too…you know…in order to keep them ‘safe’ and ‘at home’?

During the Covid-19 Pandemic, our office remains operational to assist you in your family law matter. While we are not conducting meetings and consultations in person at the office, we are doing so via telephone and via video conference. If you wish to schedule a consultation, please call us at 905-237-7332 and leave us a voicemail with a call-back number and someone will be in touch with you to book the consultation.

We are wishing everyone health and safety.

The marriage is over. You know it. You haven’t talked separation yet, or mentioned the D word, but it’s there, waiting…

It’s too soon to consult a lawyer, isn’t it? Not yet, not at this stage. It doesn’t seem right to call before you and your spouse have even had the conversation. That would be mean, wouldn’t it?

No.

I know, I hear you. You’re done, you don’t want to see your spouse’s face again. You don’t want him or her in your space, in your house. 

You’re going to pack up your soon to be ex’s crap and change the locks. You’re perfectly within your rights to kick him or her out of the matrimonial home. 

Do you have plans for the next school break? Thinking about taking the kids away for Christmas? 

Before you start trolling the net for cheap tickets to Florida, or book that all inclusive in the Dominican, the one with the massive slide and ziplining, before you do anything—you need your ex to sign a Travel Consent.